Pictures

 I love the look on his face.

At the Magic House for Noontime New Year's Eve. 

We all promptly got the stomach flu after this. Happy New Year!

 One stop on our trip to Phoenix.

 At the ghost town near Phoenix.

He stayed outside in the snow fewer than five minutes. 

Not a fan of being cold.

There and Back Again

We took our first big road trip as a family of four this weekend. Unfortunately it was for my grandfather's funeral. He was 88 years old and had a good life filled with children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren. The thing I'll remember most about him is his joy. I'm sure he had his worries and bad days just like everyone else, but I can only remember him smiling. In fact, as I was listening to the pastor speak during the service I could hear my grandfather's laughter. I'm very sad I'll never get to see him again, but I have fond memories.

At first Heath and I discussed me flying up to Wisconsin alone, but a funeral isn't something you want to attend without your family. In fact, though it was a sad occasion, overall it was a good trip because we got to visit relatives we don't see very often. My grandma got to see Ben again and meet Avery and Sam for the first time. Plus, my dad was surrounded by his children and grandchildren at his father's funeral and we supported him with our presence.

The boys were very good on the trip. It took over 10 hours of driving each way, but we didn't have too much fussiness (thanks - in Ben's case - to the three viewings of Toy Story on the drive up). They both slept in the car at least part of the time and we managed to stop enough to avoid the "I have to use the potty" moment, which would give us 2-3 minutes to find a suitable place. I'm glad our three year old didn't have to pee on the side of the highway. Or, worse yet, in a bottle in the car.

Honestly, I'm glad we took this trip. It was very tiring for Heath and me (physically and emotionally), but we managed to throw together a 10+ hour road trip with two young children in one day and everything turned out fine. To a worrier and a planner like me, that seems almost impossible, but it was a good lesson.

I'll miss you, Papa.

Pix or it didn't happen!

Ben had a blast in the sand

The first of hopefully many family portraits on Anna Maria

The water was cold, but he didn't seem to notice

Me as a mermaid

I thought this was a nice action shot

At the Mote Aquarium in Sarasota

Grandpa coaxing Ben into the water

So relaxing...

Florida!

For the past week Heath, Ben and I have been in Florida with Heath's parents. We went to Anna Maria Island, which is on the Gulf side, near Sarasota. Heath went there at least once a year from ages 2-15. I now know why they kept going back. It was wonderful. The weather was absolutely perfect. The island isn't very commercialized and no building is over 6 stories. The beach was white sand with calm waves and though I didn't think it was very crowded at all, they assured me it was about as crowded as it ever gets. We had an awesome time.

Ben loved the beach, as I knew he would. The water was a little cold, so we didn't do much more than play at the shore, but he had a blast with the sand. We never got very far with our sandcastles, because he would storm into them, wreaking havoc. He also loved getting to hang out with Daddy, Grandma and Grandpa for seven days straight. Plus, ice cream every night. So he was pretty much in toddler heaven. As an added bonus, he was great on the plane rides. On the way there he slept the whole time and on the way back he was pretty amused by his iPod and playing with the window shades.

So, it was a good vacation. We'll definitely be going back.

Reunion

Last Thursday through Sunday Heath and I were in Indianapolis attending GenCon. It's a gaming convention where people get together and play board games, card games, video games and role playing games. We met our friends Arianne and Jeff there and had a blast hanging out all weekend, playing games and meeting some idols.

While Mommy and Daddy had a weekend away, Ben stayed with Oma and Opa. The last time we'd been away from him this long was in November, when we went to Hawaii. He was only 14 months old at the time and though he did fine while we were gone, after we got back he held a little grudge against all the grandparents. So it's no surprise my mother was a little concerned that the same thing would happen again.

When we walked in the door on Sunday afternoon Ben's face scrunched up and he started to cry. My mother was quick to say, "This is the first time he's cried all weekend!" He seemed unable to run over to us, but when I knelt down next to him he threw his arms around me and held on for dear life. I was exhausted from the weekend and happy to see him and very happy that he didn't push me away in favor of Heath, so I joined him with some crying of my own.

For me, missing Ben is a novelty. I'm with him so much that I never have the chance. We're more like college roommates living in a tiny dorm room. We have days we're the best of friends and we have days we're on each other's last nerve. And I have to admit, I didn't miss Ben much this weekend. I was glad to be away, doing something I wanted to do, doing something fun for me. And I know Ben had fun, too. Who can resist a weekend of being spoiled by your grandparents? But in the end, the best part of a trip is always coming home. Though that doesn't mean I won't go next year!

I'm including this picture not because it has anything to do with Ben, but because it is freaking awesome:

 Me & Wil Wheaton

Vacation!

Two weeks ago we went to the Lake of the Ozarks and stayed at a resort with my parents, brothers and sisters-in-law. Although the trip had its ups and downs, it was fun to all be together as a family. There was swimming, there was 500, there was a boat trip that turned people against each other and had Heath cackling like a deranged pirate.

The first night Ben woke up at midnight and wouldn't go back to sleep until 5am. That pretty much made the entire trip exhausting for me, but I suppose I should get used to that. I don't see a relaxing vacation in my future for a long, long time. At least I'll have my memories of Hawaii...

Here's photographic proof that we went:

Using iPods as a family

A nice relaxing boat ride...

Hmm... Those are some menacing clouds in the distance...

Lesson learned: Don't f*** with Mother Nature 

(especially when nobody really knows how to drive a boat).

Aloooooooooooha!

Hawaii was amazing. It's hard to believe a place can have such perfect weather all year round. It was warm during the day, cool at night and the rain was minimal. Hawaiians are all so laid back it's almost impossible to hate them for their good luck. Almost.

The vacation was long enough that we didn't have to cram activities in to do everything we wanted. We went surfing and snorkeling, we climbed Diamond Head, we attended a luau, we rented mopeds (which was Heath's idea... I was scared shitless the entire time), we got massages and we spent a lot of time lounging on the beach watching guys try to sell sunset boat rides. I have to say, out of that entire list, sitting on the beach reading and people watching was my favorite activity. Here imagine a sound file of my mom saying, "Duh."

Before leaving I was nervous that I'd spend the entire vacation worrying about Ben, but I passed even my own best case scenario. Of course we called home a few times and toward the end of the week we looked at his pictures more, but I was successfully able to put him out of my mind and relax. It was so nice to be on my own schedule and not have to worry about when Ben should eat or nap or whatever. We never woke up much past 7:00am, but we woke up naturally and that makes all the difference.

According to all the reports, Ben did well while we were gone, too. He ate and slept and played pretty much like normal. I think that contributed to my relaxing ability.

By the end of the week we were ready to come home and after a red-eye flight to L.A. and a 7am flight to St. Louis, there were Don and Ben picking us up from the airport. I was afraid Ben might be pissed at us (or, more likely, me, since he's a total Daddy's Boy), so I wasn't sure what to expect when I opened the car door. He stared at me for a second, as if trying to process what he was seeing. Then he smiled. Then he blew a raspberry at me. We spent the drive home giggling in the backseat, simply excited to see each other again. Once we got home he was all over Heath and didn't even let me hold him, which I admit stung a little. But yesterday morning when he woke up at 5:30am I took him into the guest room to sleep some more. Before he drifted off again he pressed his face against mine, as if trying to fuse them. And when he woke up he started laughing, overjoyed to see me.

Photographic evidence that I caught a wave. I may look cool, but I was most certainly thinking, "Holy shit, I'm doing it!" In the photos preceding this I was flailing my arms wildly, trying to gain my balance.

Yes, Heath was sticking his butt out that much in all the pictures!

Just because Heath - shall we say - doubted my ability to surf, I'll share this picture of him falling spectacularly. :)

Me with the mopeds at the bottom of Diamond Head. Notice how I'm standing a safe distance away?

The view of Diamond Head Crater from the summit.

Hanauma Bay, where we went snorkeling.

Rie & Paul, the actual reason we went to Hawaii.

I'm not sure if I have enough Hawaiian shirts

On Sunday Heath and I are leaving for Hawaii. We'll be gone an entire week and Ben's alternately staying with Ian and Bekah and both sets of grandparents. Heath and I haven't been on a trip like this since our honeymoon and to say that I'm looking forward to it is the understatement of the year. There have been ticker tape parades going through my head every time I've thought of it for the past six months.

BUT (isn't there always one?), this will be the longest we've been away from Ben and the freaking out started weeks ago. Intellectually I know he'll be fine. He'll be with people who love him and will most likely spoil him rotten. But I keep imagining that moment we leave. He'll probably start crying and it's going to break my heart because he has no idea how long we'll be gone, or even if we're coming back. He's getting better at understanding what we say, but there's no way to explain this to him. I know once we're sitting on the beach, sleeping uninterrupted and eating meals at the same time I'll be fine, but I'm a world class worrier. Case in point, I'm writing an entire blog entry worrying about being worried.

However (that's just a fancy "but"), we need this vacation. The first year of someone's life is like boot camp for the parents and we need to get away and remember that our marriage came first. It's going to be a wonderful trip and I'm determined to enjoy every minute of it, but I have to admit, I'm also looking forward to seeing Ben's smile when we come home.

Vacation, all I ever wanted...

We were on vacation in Minnesota and Wisconsin for 8 days and 7 nights. By the 7th night I could've stored all our luggage in the bags under my eyes. I don't think I'll ever again take Ben on vacation without Heath. My parents, Ian and Bekah were a huge help, but there are times when he only wants Mommy or Daddy. And when Daddy's not around, it all falls on Mommy. It didn't help that his sleep schedule got all messed up, so he never went to bed before 8:30pm and never woke up after 5:45am. All. Week. Long. Heath joined us for my cousin's wedding on the weekend, and I had never been so excited to see him, although my joy was masked by my crushing fatigue.

That being said, I'm glad we went. Ben got to spend time with his great-grandparents, his great-aunts and uncles and various other relatives. He also got to spend a lot of time with his Oma and Opa, Uncle Ian and Aunt Bekah, which is great because he'll be all the the more comfortable with them come November, when Mommy and Daddy are going to Hawaii BY THEMSELVES (can you tell I'm just a wee bit excited about that? not only about relaxing on the beach and spending time together, but just the thought of packing for a trip and NOT having to pack for a toddler makes me giddy).

I feel like Ben grew up on this trip. He's not really a baby anymore. He can't walk just yet, but he's so close it'll be any second. And his diet expanded significantly. It was like all of a sudden he couldn't get enough of solid food. He was introduced to the concept that on vacation you eat a lot of junk. He had his first tastes of ice cream, Jell-o, french fries and blueberry muffins. We also discovered that the kid is a carb freak. We did not find his threshold for eating bread. As far as we know, he'll continue eating it indefinitely. I guess he won't be going on Atkins anytime soon.

Once again, Ben proved what a tremendous traveler he is. He did spectacularly well in the car and the frequent changes in environment didn't seem to throw him too much. By the end of the week you could tell he was wiped out, so by the day of my cousin's wedding he was pretty grouchy. The people sitting in front of us got a nice recitation of The Very Hungry Caterpillar about a dozen times during the ceremony. However, the kid is a trooper. And on Sunday he found out just how wonderful it is to come home after a long trip. He was so excited to be home. He crawled around examining everything and squeaked with joy, as if to say, "I never thought I'd see you again!"

It's been nice to be home this week, but we've had trouble getting back on schedule. Ben is resisting naps and putting him to bed at night is horrible. We're back to letting him cry it out and it's been 30-60 minutes (or more) before he finally falls asleep. I think it's because Heath usually puts him to bed and after being away from him for a week Ben's afraid he'll be gone again. It's really sweet and it shows how much he loves his daddy, but it's very stressful for all of us.

Just to end on a pleasant note, I'll share my favorite memory from the week: It was Saturday morning and when I woke up Heath and Ben were lounging on the other bed. I joined them and we all just snuggled for a while, happy to be together again. It was one of those moments that makes you feel all the other crap is totally worth it.

It just might

Sorry for the lack of posting over the last week. Ben's been teething and then we all came down with colds. Taking care of a now-mobile baby with a cold, while I have a cold is a feat unto itself, without having to worry about being entertaining.

And, unfortunately, there probably won't be too many posts until the last week of July. We're taking a road trip Up North, visiting relatives in Minnesota and Wisconsin. Actually, we'll be visiting a lot of the people who read this blog, who will be meeting Ben for the first time! So there will be much to report on our return, assuming the trip doesn't kill me.

Ben the Traveler

Whew! Ben had a weekend full of firsts. His first time at a museum, an aquarium and an Ikea! He also went swimming for the first time. It was a busy Memorial Day.

We went to visit my college roommate Arianne and her husband Jeff. They live in Oxford, OH which is home to Miami University and not much else. So we spent a lot of our time driving around Ohio... and Indiana... and Kentucky... The Cincinnati area encompasses many states.

We visited the Creation Museum. As an atheist and a science nerd, Heath got giddy just thinking about it. It didn't exactly deliver what he was expecting, which was apparently more science and less "Bible crap." I was actually surprised by how MUCH science there was and how little it was politicized. Of course, there were a whole lot of incongruities to their "science," such as how supposedly dinosaurs all died in the world-wide flood, and yet they were included on the ark; and the Bible is okay with natural selection, but their definition of natural selection sounds a whole lot like the traditional definition of evolution. Regardless, it was at least interesting to see the creationists' arguments against evolution in a somewhat reasoned way. The most interesting thing to me was how much they played up dinosaurs. They were adamant that dinosaurs DID exist, they just lived side by side with humans 6000 years ago. They were even in the Garden of Eden! The only reason we could think of that they were pushing dinosaurs so much is that dinosaurs are cool and kids love them. There was a t-shirt in the gift shop that said, "Taking dinosaurs back!" so I think we were right.

We also visited the Newport Aquarium, which was fun because it was something Ben could enjoy, too. He seemed to like watching the fish. Unfortunately, by that time we were well past lunch and he started getting cranky. Frankly, I was feeling a bit cranky myself. There's only so much of museum crowds I can take before wanting to kill them all. I suppose at the Creation Museum that would've been acceptable, because they just would've assumed it was the rapture, but it seemed a little harsh at the aquarium. So many innocent fish.

On Sunday we were planning to make a picnic and go to a park to hang out, but there was rain in the forecast, so we decided to celebrate our fallen soldiers with rampant, mega-store consumerism instead. Very American, right? We visited Ikea, a first for the Borders family. Then after lunch we headed to Jungle Jim's, the hugest freaking grocery store I've ever seen. It seems lame to visit a grocery store on vacation, but seriously. The place is amazing. The liquor department alone was the size of an entire grocery store. The international foods department was ANOTHER whole store. It'd be a work out just to do your weekly shopping there.

We ended our day by going for a swim at the hotel. It was Ben's first time in a pool and after his initial unsureness and death grip on Daddy, he really seemed to enjoy himself. He splashed up a storm and by the end he was kicking his legs when we floated him around. He even intentionally put his face in the water a couple times, I think because he saw us do it. So that was a great success, which is good because he starts swimming lessons next week.

Ben is turning into quite the little traveler. It was a 6 hour car ride each way and overall he did really well. His eating and napping schedule was messed up all weekend, but he took it in stride. I think I was more thrown off by that than he was. And since he was so tired from activities all day, he even slept in in the mornings, which is unheard of!

So we had a great weekend. Arianne and Jeff are wonderful hosts. As an added bonus, Jeff is also a great cook. And their cat Jiji was very adept at avoiding Ben at all costs. He has good survivial instincts!