PTO mom

I have become a PTO mom. It's bizarre because I never envisioned myself being a stay-at-home mom who goes to PTO meetings. Even typing that I have a sort of visceral negative reaction. PTO moms are super bubbly and annoying and they only live vicariously through their children. And I've met some people like that, but most of the people I've met have been pretty down to earth and just want to invest some time and energy into their child's education. Some have even been people I'd like to hang out with.

So I volunteered to help organize Ben's school's trivia night, which is the biggest fundraiser of the year. I didn't quite know what I was getting into, but Heath and I love trivia nights and have been to quite a few, so I thought my "expertise" could help. It pretty much took over my life for the past few months, which explains the dearth of posts here, but now it's OVER and I don't feel like I have an anvil hanging over my head. It was a very successful evening and everyone seemed to have fun. I definitely won't be in charge next year, but I'll help and maybe in a few years, once I've forgotten all the stress it caused me, I might volunteer to organize one again. I suppose in that way it's like having a baby. After a while you forget all the horribleness and that's what allows you to want another one.

A pat on my back

As a stay-at-home mom it can be very difficult to know when I'm doing a good job. After all, what is my job? It's to raise my children and help them become good people. That's not exactly a goal that gives me weekly progress reports and promising statistics. It's very hard to quantify "turning someone into a decent human being."

Honestly, most days I feel like I'm doing an awful job. I let Ben play the iPad too much. Sam's clothes are always covered in spit up and drool. I'm not consistent enough in my rules and punishments. I never come up with fun games or projects or adventures for us to do. I yell and get annoyed too often. There's no boss to swing by my desk and tell me she likes my work (and I'm getting a raise!). So I take my solace where I can get it, if Ben says "Thank you" without a prompting, or if I make Sam laugh.

But sometimes I get a big thumbs up from the universe. Ben's been taking soccer classes all year and recently graduated up to the class without a parent. We get to watch and I've been utterly delighted. Not by his soccer skills, but because he's one of the best behaved kids in the class. He always listens to the teacher, follows directions and he rarely runs off to do his own thing. It makes me proud to watch him out there. Proud of him for being such a good student and proud of me because I DID THAT.

Somewhere there's a groundhog with a price on his head

Punxsutawney Phil saw his shadow.

I've never minded winter. I've always been an "indoor" type of girl. But being stuck inside the house with an infant for months on end is driving me nuts. Getting out of the house is crucial to feeling like a real person and not just a Baby Butler. But when it's so cold and the weather's bad, sometimes it doesn't feel worth the effort of bundling him up and lugging the car seat around. So for the last few weeks Ben and I have spent many a day hanging around the house. I think even he gets bored with our living room sometimes.

I am very eagerly awaiting spring. Then we can go to the zoo or the Botanical Gardens or one of the many nearby parks. Even a walk around the neighborhood is sometimes good enough to stave off boredom. I suppose I could go to museums and walk around when it's cold, but museums are usually so quiet. Nobody needs their quiet contemplation of great art interrupted by the screech of a baby objecting to an artist's interpretation of a seascape. I've opted for the mall on occasions when I just needed to get out of the house, but even that gets boring after a while, and can be dangerous for the wallet.

So the proclamation of 6 more weeks of winter did not sit well with me. Someone go hold an umbrella over that rodent so his shadow disappears.